You need to get a jean in a bigger size. We got to get some of that muffin in...– Clinton Kelly - What Not to Wear
British girl's heart heals itself after transplant... →
Crazy! But exciting.
I had a dream last night. It was probably the most upsetting one I’ve had in a while. I was out to dinner with my family and friends, but my boyfriend was absent. It was obvious to me that he wasn’t there, but no one wanted to discuss it. Finally, I made someone answer me. She said, “He’s actually on a date right now.” I must of looked confused, because then she said,...
I’ve just realized that the only mirror in my office is at the bottom of my tea mug. As far as I can tell, I look good.
Wear the old coat and buy the new book. — Austin Phelps– Via myFavorite blog
Sick and Self-Defacating (Where I literally shit...
Monica: [making food] I think I just ruined 6 eggs.
Me: That's what my mom says about her children.
fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant filled with odd little waiters who...– lemony snicket (via iamjack)
Thanks for not laughing or pointing. One of you even made sympathetic eyes with me. While I really would of liked a hug about that time, I also know that it would of been kind of weird to hug a total stranger. Anyways, thanks. And sorry you had to see that. I know how awkward it can be to those who saw me crying on Max and the bus - m4w (Downtown). missed connections
What should I get Boyfriend for his birthday? I already know, but still. A second opinion doesn’t hurt. Right?
an accountant in my office, upon seeing me white out a mistake, told me, “Ugh, don’t be tacky.” lqtm.
The best conversation
I was recently robbed my my bank for 5 over draft fees of $35 each. This is the online chat I had with “Allison”: Allison: She did confirm that there were a total of four fees of $35 each assessed as a result of this payment being presented on 6/29/09. However, one of the fees has already been returned to your account, so I can submit a refund of $105 to your account. Me: Thank...